bruh so ok at home we have this fucking sweet ass game called club penguin right and wed all play it even though like jade would never be on at the same god damn time because she lived in the actual middle of nowhere on a fucking volcanic island she somehow had all the coins in existence and like the hottest penguin shit in her igloo meanwhile johns penguin looked like his mentally challenged flippers built the walls out of yellow snow asshole never wanted to sign in because he just got the newest nintendo or whatever who the fuck has time to play a console game anyway so like i would get up early as fuck so i can get the head start on all that waddle action before the daily beatdowns bomb red penguin that literally every penguin babe would get their rocks off to and then bring those rocks to me as a method of wooing my sexy ass i was rolling in the coins from the night before becoming a surfing fucking master i was ready to go on a shopping spread and deck the beak out to the nines full my upgraded ice fortress with high end living so im wandering around the world and notice everythings god damn empty its a ghost town and im thinking i somehow ended up at the wrong pole before i dismiss it as it being on account of it being buttfuck am in the morning and no one is as dedicated of a penguin as me im a fucking emperor penguin and i need to be here for my people set good impressions i waddle off to the clothes shop and pimp myself out with a hoodie and some bling treat yoself to a new pet puffle bro new little companion to share my rich fulfilling fish eating life with anyway so we gotta feed it so i click go to igloo but fucking the thing wont let me go it keeps saying its full but im living in the MANSIONS of igloos right now so theres no way its full up the occupancy is just me and my new cat puffle whatever it was a cat in my head i named it kitty just this same message over and over about it being full up i keep clicking at it long enough to form a rhythm and develop like four penguin raps about igloos until the loading animation finally pops up and lets me in my house so like apparently while i was out doing my thang some douchebag decided to throw a fucking houseparty in my gloo ninja party at striders so theres all these waddling fucks in my house and you know what theyre talking about??? steve fucking irwin and his god damn stingray what the FUCK
text;
and wed all play it
even though like jade would never be on at the same god damn time because she lived in the actual middle of nowhere on a fucking volcanic island
she somehow had all the coins in existence
and like the hottest penguin shit in her igloo
meanwhile johns penguin looked like his mentally challenged flippers built the walls out of yellow snow
asshole never wanted to sign in
because he just got the newest nintendo or whatever
who the fuck has time to play a console game
anyway so like
i would get up early as fuck so i can get the head start on all that waddle action before the daily beatdowns
bomb red penguin that literally every penguin babe would get their rocks off to and then bring those rocks to me as a method of wooing my sexy ass
i was rolling in the coins from the night before becoming a surfing fucking master
i was ready to go on a shopping spread and deck the beak out to the nines
full my upgraded ice fortress with high end living
so im wandering around the world and notice everythings god damn empty
its a ghost town and im thinking i somehow ended up at the wrong pole before i dismiss it as it being on account of it being buttfuck am in the morning and no one is as dedicated of a penguin as me
im a fucking emperor penguin and i need to be here for my people
set good impressions
i waddle off to the clothes shop and pimp myself out with a hoodie and some bling
treat yoself to a new pet puffle bro
new little companion to share my rich fulfilling fish eating life with
anyway so we gotta feed it so i click go to igloo
but fucking
the thing wont let me go
it keeps saying its full
but im living in the MANSIONS of igloos right now so theres no way its full up
the occupancy is just me and my new cat
puffle
whatever
it was a cat in my head i named it kitty
just this same message over and over about it being full up
i keep clicking at it long enough to form a rhythm and develop like four penguin raps about igloos
until
the loading animation finally pops up and lets me in my house
so like apparently while i was out doing my thang
some douchebag decided to throw a fucking houseparty in my gloo
ninja party at striders
so theres all these waddling fucks in my house
and you know what theyre talking about???
steve fucking irwin and his god damn stingray
what the FUCK